I’m a New Mom and I Get Great Sleep
We are often told that sleep goes out the window when you become a mother. I'd like to dispel the myth that bad sleep and motherhood inevitably go hand in hand (with Oura sleep scores).
I remember bringing my newborn baby home for the first time about six months ago. Not only had I heard that my sleep was going to drastically change from friends and family prior to his birth, but I had also read on every blog and online magazine that bad sleep was just an unfortunate part of motherhood.
It was something that seemed inevitable. So, it came as a bit of a shock when the night rolled around and my newborn actually slept well (I remember reading that my Oura sleep score was in the 90’s). It’s as if I was waiting for him to suddenly become a “bad sleeper” because there was no such thing as a “good sleeper.”
Don’t get me wrong, there were absolutely nights where I felt like I was not fully rested and was constantly waking up, but I honestly didn’t mind the moments where I got to breastfeed my baby back to sleep.
This is a controversial topic to say the least. In the modern day and age of breastfeeding being a bad sleep association and cosleeping considered a dangerous practice, many would consider our family’s nightly routine to be wrong. However, every baby is different and parents need to do what’s best for their particular family. And our family chooses to breastfeed and safely cuddle to sleep.
Rather than being bad sleepers, I’d like to think of babies as being different sleepers with different needs. Two of those needs include being fed and being comforted. If we take the time to understand how their biology works and how it differs from our own adult systems, we can better support them throughout the night, which will benefit everybody in the long run.
Women were given the beautiful gift of nursing and we should happily use this gift. I understand some aren’t able to breastfeed and need to use formula for their babies, so I’m only speaking on what I have personally experienced.
Our night looks a little like this: we start to wind down at about 6:30pm to 7pm every night and turn on the red lights in our bedroom (exposure to blue light suppresses the body’s release of melatonin and hinders sleep). Then, I get our little one into jammies, do a quick diaper change, and begin to nurse lying down (on a firm, organic mattress with no extra pillows or blankets nearby). We’re asleep by 8:30pm and a great night of sleep ensues.
I’ve used Oura to track my sleep for a couple of years now and my scores would reach anywhere between 70 to 75 on a good night and 60 to 65 on a bad night. However, that drastically changed when I became a mom.
Below is a snippet of my usual scores:
So, why does breastfeeding and cuddling to sleep work so beautifully? When parents and babies sleep together, their heart rates, brain waves, sleep states, oxygen levels, temperature, and breathing influence one another.
My calmness and steady breathing helps my babe to relax and stay soothed throughout the entire night, with minimal awakening.
Melatonin, oxytocin, prolactin and tryptophan are also at play. Melatonin, a hormone produced by the pineal gland that helps regulate sleep and circadian rhythms, is present in breast milk and is higher during the night rather than the day with a peak concentration at 3am.
Oxytocin and prolactin both promote relaxation and bonding during the act of breastfeeding, which help to achieve deep and restful sleep. More prolactin is produced at night, so breastfeeding at night is especially helpful for keeping up the milk supply.
I believe these hormones provide the perfect synergistic effect that ultimately contribute to a healthy night of rest for mother, baby, and father. Why would anyone want to deny this advantageous contribution from Mother Nature?
Instead of dooming mothers (and fathers) with a farewell to sleep speech, I believe women need to be encouraged and supported with nighttime parenting. Because, yes, it is possible to be a new mom and get great sleep. And mothers need to hear this.